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I'm here to make sure you become irresistible to recruiters and hiring managers. In an extremely competitive marketplace, I can show you how to take back control of the job search, become a stand-out candidate and ultimately land you your dream career. Oh, and I promise to make the process fun. Yes, fun.

I'm Jena

If You are a Careerwoman and Single, You Need to Listen to This

Being a careerwoman and single is a topic that connects with me both professionally and personally – and I think it may for many of you too. I am thrilled to have Yelena Bosovik on this episode with me to talk about being single and rocking the career world. 

Yelena is a tax lawyer, author, magazine founder and editor in chief. She is involved in her church, mentoring young women, and is an inspiring woman all around! She moved from one of the big 4 accounting firms to a smaller firm recently. She’s the oldest of 10 (wow!) and has many siblings who are engaged and married. Plus she’s from a small immigrant community. She is a phenomenal woman who is rocking a different path than many from her growing up community, and she’s done so as a courageous pioneer. We talk about that journey and what it’s been like to be single along the way. 


What We’re Talking About 

  • Navigating your career and singleness
  • Where your identity intersects with your work 
  • How to think toward your legacy today


Working and Singleness

Yelena shares that she loves to work and for awhile, she didn’t want to get married. She felt pressure from her community growing up that you either get married or you go to work – not both. It was an either/or. 

A few years ago, God started to show her that it isn’t either/or. And she became much more open to it. She shared about the health scare that was a wakeup call to change her habits in her professional life to have more of a work-life balance.

Yelena said: “I definitely have that struggle of wanting to use my job as a way to show that I am doing something worthwhile. You see other people around you getting married, buying houses, settling down, and I long for that too. But I don’t want to feel like I’m settling in a bad way. I’m not filling my life with all the other things the people around me are filling their life with. 

For whatever reason, it seems like getting married, buying a house, and settling down, those are real-life events. That’s life moving forward. And if you’re not doing those things, your life must be standing still. So to justify that, you kind of overcompensate with work, travel, or something else that seems important or counteracts what everyone else is doing.”



Is Your Identity Your Work if You’re Not Married?

When she realized she needed to make changes to her work-life balance, Yelena said it was terrifying because her work was her identity. But it is so much better of a life change for her. 

Yelena shared that: “I love working and I like doing my job well. And I like to see the external recognition of doing my job well through promotions, raises, etc. so there is a certain amount of time I put into my work and the way I do it. I put all of myself into my work, putting in the hours and the time. I love what I do and put all myself into it. I sometimes have to coach myself that it is okay to leave the office at 6, it is okay if I do not get promoted early, it is okay. There is no rush. There is no pressure. I need to remember what is important.”


Legacy Matters

Lara Casey’s tools and teaching have influenced both Yelena and Jena. Yelena said that when uses Casey’s tool PowerSheets, she loves the question that asks you to think about where you want to be when you’re 80 and what do you want to have to look back on? What do you want your life to have looked like? Then work backwards. 

Yelena said it helps her to think through what she wants to hold as most important. Work is important to her, but she doesn’t don’t want it to be her main legacy. She wants community and ministry to be places of legacy. So these are places she chooses to invest in. She chooses to have margin in her life to invest in those things along with work. 

“I remind myself all the time: Your identity is not in your job. Your worth is not in your work and what you accomplish there. I keep telling myself this over and over again when I get on the hamster wheel of corporate life.”

For any single woman who’s listening to this and feels like her worth is in her work, you’re not alone. If we don’t advance or things don’t go well at work, it feels so personal. I felt like I was already failing in my personal life because I wasn’t dating, so I put all my worth in my career. So if something went wrong there, I was a mess. But it isn’t the way we have to approach our careers. 


How Singleness Impacts Career Plans

Looking back a few years ago, Yelena says she thought that once she got engaged or married she would find more of a work-life balance. But that did not happen...a health crisis intervened first and made her reevaluate. She had to decide for herself to walk into a healthier work-life balance, not wait for external circumstances to change. 

Yelena and Jena share honestly about the frustrations and bitterness that can come when you are single and long to be married. They both share about ways they worked through that...and struggled in it too. 

One question Jena shared that she wish she had heard much earlier on came to her from Stephanie May Wilson, “If you knew you only had 5 years left of being single, how would you live your life accordingly?”

If marriage is the desire of your heart, start thinking through that and praying through it. But you also don’t have to muster it up. And your life looks like it is supposed to be, right now. 


What You’re Doing Matters. Period. 

What you’re doing in the world isn’t more or less impactful because of engagement or marriage. It matters, period. 

Yelena told us she is in a season of trying to trust God for the very best offer for her, and believing she also has that right now. It is a challenge to walk the balance between being passive and still and putting yourself out there. It’s a really hard balance!


The Intersection of Career and Marriage

As a single many of us gals worry about how we will balance marriage and maybe one day kids too. Yelena says she used to worry about this a lot, but she doesn’t anymore. Many people in her community told Yelena that it didn’t make sense for her to go to law school, go to work, take on debt, build a career, because the eventuality was that she would be married and have babies and be at home. After hearing this over and over, she really wrestled with if it was true or not. 

So she dove into it headfirst with a study on women in the Bible who worked. And what she found was that if you are married, it doesn’t mean you’re idle. Yelena wrote a portion of a Bible study available at Tirzah Magazine’s shop all about women who worked in the Bible. 

Women working outside the home can be controversial in conservative church environments and even conservative culture as a whole. And then there is the other path of women having it all, working and crushing it, and getting all the help to raise your children. Yelena really wrestled with this, at different times falling on different ends of the spectrum. One idea she loves is looking at everything at the beginning of each year and evaluating what she is picking up and putting down for that year. It will likely look different in each season. 

Both Jena and Yelena are working on living somewhere in the middle between being at home with kids or being at work and being totally independent. And it’s a place of growth in every season! Yelena urged us to not take ourself out of the running before it’s time. When it’s time, you’ll cross that bridge. But don’t take yourself out until it’s the season where it’s right to do so. 


Career, Life, Singleness, and Marriage All Matter

Be intentional in your career and life. They go hand in hand. They aren’t as compartmentalized as we may want to make them. So think through where you want to be long-term in your career and life – and then do what you need to do to make that align. 

Connect with Yelena on Instagram, Tirzah Magazine, and LinkedIn


Links Mentioned

Enneagram 

Lara Casey 

Love Your Single Life course by Stephanie May Wilson

Jena on Stephanie May Wilson’s Podcast Girls Night #75: Our Best Encouragement for the Woman Who's Sick of Being Single

JV IG post about engagement 

Mandisa series 

Tirzah Magazine 

Tirzah Magazine Shop

Connect with Jena on LinkedIn

Find Jena on Instagram

Snag Jena’s Free Resources for You

Connect with Yelena on Instagram 

Connect with Yelena on LinkedIn


“That’ll Preach” Quotes

“Time goes so fast.  If I’m working a ton, I don’t have time in my schedule or margin, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually, to do anything else.”

“I remind myself all the time: Your identity is not in your job. Your worth is not in your work and what you accomplish there. I keep telling myself this over and over again when I get on the hamster wheel of corporate life.”

“I can reach the legacy I long to have by the time I’m 80 whether I am married or not. And so I recalibrated my life as a single career woman to include more of the things I want to invest in right now, rather than waiting for marriage. It’s time now to invest in the legacy I want to have.”

“I don’t think God promised us marriage. I think marriage is still important. But marriage is not more important than or Godly than singleness. God promised me himself and he is going to be enough.”

“Do not take yourself out of the running before it’s time. When it’s time, you’ll cross that bridge. But don’t take yourself out until it’s the season where it’s right to do so.”


 

Yelena Boscovic | Guest on Your Career Story Podcast

Yelena’s Bio:

Yelena is a tax lawyer and the founder and editor in chief of an online women’s lifestyle magazine, Tirzah Magazine. She is involved in her church’s teen and youth ministries, has a passion for pointing young women to Christ, and enjoys reading, writing, traveling, and spending time with her family. Yelena's first book, a devotional Bible study for waiting seasons, will be released in Fall 2020.

Career

If You Are a Careerwoman and Single, You Need to Listen to This

July 8, 2020

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recruit the employer

resources for your

Career

digital devotional

resume writing 101

freebie
my signature program

Word at work

digital devotional

Follow me on 

I'm here to make sure you become irresistible to recruiters and hiring managers. In an extremely competitive marketplace, I can show you how to take back control of the job search, become a stand-out candidate and ultimately land you your dream career. Oh, and I promise to make the process fun. Yes, fun.

I'm Jena